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Discover Him and Find His Healing Touch

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Godly Beginnings for the Family

Godly Beginnings for the Family

Paul and Linda J. Bucknell

Godly Beginnings for the Family Index

Starting Families Right | Family Commitment | Family Planning | Husband & Wife Roles | Family Health Plan | Preparations for Childbirth | Tender Newborn Care | Challenge of Child Training | Disciplining & Training Small Children | Setting up Godly Routines

God's Family Health Plan


God's Family Health Plan reveals God's plan for health and nutrition for a family and an expecting mother. Topics include: God's good design for health, marital relationships, STDs, abstinency, nutrition, fats, sugars, fiber, circumcision and diseases which come from unresolved relational (people to people) sins. This is part of the book: Godly Beginnings for the Family.

Learning how to care for infants, before, during and after birth!

Most people never think of the Bible as a health book. But surprise! It is. There are so many teachings, instructions and examples given regarding our health concerns that they will stun the modern reader.

We sterilize God’s teaching with spiritual jargon as if it has nothing to do with our daily lives, but God has tied health with obedience. Lack of good health can be a sign of disobedience, discipline, or judgment.

A) God's Health Plan

God has provided many guidelines in His Word to enable us to keep and maintain good health. God made it so that the individual could live long and healthy lives. God wants healthy people! The parents are responsible before God to properly care for their own bodies. God has also put the health of children in their parents’ hands so that they can please their Lord and effectively carry out His work.

A puzzle?
Did we ever think about where herbs come from? Who gave expert advice on dietary laws? Where do we learn how to deal with relational problems with great success? How are we able to conquer fears and anxieties? Where do we learn about inner cleansing of the body?

Our Designer provided all these and more in His Holy Word! We are not promising perfectly healthy bodies, but as we take His Word seriously, many problems that we would otherwise encounter are no longer present.

About 150 years ago in a famous Vienna hospital one out of every six new mothers died. Ignaz Semmelweis made an astounding observation in the obstetrical ward. He spotted a connection between which mothers died and those that examined them. It happened to be the teachers and students who examined these mothers.

He suggested that those touching corpses should first wash their hands. After this rule was implemented, in the first month only one out of every forty-two women died. Then he noticed another connection. He suggested that all doctors, students, nurses wash their hands between patients (not just after examining the corpses).

He was ridiculed and lost his job. The same scenario happened in another hospital. “The strain plus the death cries of dying mothers so haunted and weighed on his sensitive nature that his mind finally broke…. Died in a mental institution.”

Today we know the importance of hand washing as troublesome as it may be. Many deaths could have been avoided if the medical community had simply followed God’s careful instructions given back 2000 B.C.

“The one who touches the corpse of any person shall be unclean for seven days” (Numbers 19:11)

“Now when the man with the discharge becomes cleansed from his discharge, then he shall count off for himself seven days for his cleansing; he shall then wash his clothes and bathe his body in running water and shall become clean” (Leviticus 15:13).

God gave them proper hygienic techniques including washing under running water rather than in a still basin, washing and changing clothes, and time intervals to allow the sun to kill bacteria not washed off. As God’s children, we have inherited this precious volume, which includes many special insights for living healthy lives.

God wants us to have godly and healthy children. We understand that we live in a sin-cursed world and that some run off from it will impact both our lives and the lives of our children. But we should strategize to minimize this impact and increase God’s touch on their lives by introducing them to biblical instruction and caution.

When a couple is about to have their first child, they are starting off on a new adventure. They are open to rethinking their lifestyles and choices. Let’s take a look at God’s Family Health Plan for His people. You might ask two questions: 1) What are its benefits? And 2) What are its costs?

The Benefits of God’s Health Plan

Signed up yet?“I will put none of the diseases on you which I have put on the Egyptians; for I, the LORD, am your healer” (Exodus 15:26).

The ancient Egyptians had health books just like we do, though admittedly in different form! They listed the symptoms, diseases and possible cures. God wanted the Israelites to be free from all of those things that the Egyptians were experiencing. They just visited that country. They knew what was going on. It wasn’t much different than we experience today. The promise sounds good, but what is the catch? What did they have to do?

The Costs of God’s Family Health Plan

“And He said, “If you will give earnest heed to the voice of the LORD your God, and do what is right in His sight, and give ear to His commandments, and keep all His statutes” (Exodus 15:26).

God’s plan is rather obvious. At least there was no small print. He wants obedience. If people obey His laws, then His plan will automatically be instituted. On the other hand, if we are not faithful, then our plan can be discontinued. God said it was for our good and for our survival.

We need to first ask ourselves what commands is He talking about? What do they have to do with our well-being. Are we Jewish? First of all, we need to be extremely clear here that we are not speaking about earning salvation. Salvation is by faith in Christ Jesus not in our works. We can’t ‘go to heaven’ by living by the law because we are sinners. We are, however, to live out our salvation. These commands help us get a better perspective on health.

Obedience brings blessings - Deuteronomy 6:24-25As long as we stay on God’s path we can avoid many of life’s difficulties. Once I took a few of my children walking near a park. The path was steep, but walkable.

At the top, being in an adventurous mood, I said let’s go over there (off the path) and explore. At first we could make our way, but then we started running into these thorny brambles. They were sharp and hard to avoid. They would snag our clothes and scratch us. God’s path has been highlighted by His commands and wisdom. In as far as we walk in His ways, we can avoid many snags and diseases.

We will look at these holistic health instructions from the scriptures and see how they apply to new parents and the expecting Mom.

A)  Marital relations during and after pregnancy

We might have a few questions like: What chance is there that I have an STD? If one of us has an STD, how will this affect the baby? Can we still have sex as usual during pregnancy? What about sex after birth?

1) Sexual diseases

What a joy to a couple that lives under God's instructions on sexual purity. They have none of that extra pain, discomfort, fear, guilt or expense. They can fully appreciate the joy of sexual intimacies knowing deep in their heart that the world’s diseases can’t trouble them!

“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge” (Hebrews 13:4).

STDsSTDs (sexually transmitted diseases) are ravishing the countries of the world. These would all quickly die off if men and women only had sexual intimacies with their spouse. Having sex out of wedlock with an impure partner is like playing Russian roulette. All of this can be avoided simply by complying to God's rules for sexual purity! We understand that some of these diseases have been transmitted via birth, but they are largely transmitted due to sexual immorality therefore their name (STDs).

65 million people in the United States alone are said to live with an incurable STD. This is roughly one out of four people! Other countries suffer similar problems. Women infected with STDs while pregnant can have premature rupture of membranes, uterine infection and early onset of labor. The later leads to premature birth and leads to infant death and disability. The economic costs to STDs were estimated to be an annual 17 billion.

2) Abstinence for married couples too?

Sexual intercourse during pregnancy is fine. As the expecting wife’s body changes, there will be some adjustments. With a little extra love, sensitivity, and a good sense of humor a couple’s sexual life can be as great as ever. Some even suggest that it helps bring along labor! Is there ever a need for abstinence? God’s Word says there is.

Menstrual period abstinence

“Also you shall not approach a woman to uncover her nakedness during her menstrual impurity” (Leviticus 18:19).

We should first note for those not yet expecting, that God asks us to refrain from sex during a wife’s menstrual period. This will last about a week. If men have learned about self-control before marriage, this will remind them of those periods with a plus. They know it only lasts a week! Actually, the monthly abstinence does wonders for renewing the sexual relationship and strengthening self-control. It also helps eliminate a woman’s yeast infections.

Post-birth abstinence

“…When a woman gives birth and bears a male child… she shall remain in the blood of her purification for thirty-three days; she shall not touch any consecrated thing, nor enter the sanctuary, until the days of her purification are completed.But if she bears a female child, … she shall remain in the blood of her purification for sixty-six days…. This is the law for her who bears a child, whether a male or a female.” (Leviticus 12:2-5).

God even addresses the issue of post-birth abstinence. Actually, He speaks more clearly than a lot of guys would like! The instructions make a lot of sense though. If we have just witnessed what our wives went through in delivering our child, they need to literally regroup. Their body begins to change back to pre-pregnancy condition. Ligaments that are loosened to accommodate the baby’s birth begin to firm up.

Meanwhile Moms are very busy caring for the new baby. They need to learn or relearn how to nurse the baby. Sometimes there is soreness. They just lack that concentration that is needed for their husband. We don’t, however, understand why this process takes two months for a girl and only 1 month for a boy. One person suggested it was so that we would pray more clearly for boys!

God also uses this period of abstinence as a time to protect the wife from getting pregnant again right away. God is clearly concerned about the health of mother and child. Breast-feeding works along with this ‘birth-control’ system by inhibiting ovulation. God wants strong and healthy children. Note how these laws help protect the well-being of the new mother and works at producing strong babies. God still loves weak babies, but we don’t aim for this.

3) Fertility and Infertility

“But if you will truly obey his voice and do all that I say, then … shall be no one miscarrying or barren in your land; I will fulfill the number of your days” (Exodus 23:22, 26).

We have had our own share of miscarriages. They are tragic. Not only is the baby gone, but also the mother’s health can be in danger due to severe bleeding. An expensive D&E surgery is commonly recommended so that no remaining pieces are left to cause infection or excessive bleeding. With each miscarriage we have sought more wisdom and further observed God’s Word.

(Footnotes are in the purchased copy).

Living by God’s way brings a host of promises and blessings. God is definitely pro-life. God wants every married woman to have a child.

“You shall be blessed above all peoples; there shall be no male or female barren among you or among your cattle” (Deuteronomy 7:14).

In our sin-filled world infertility happens. Infertility can result from a number of causes. Not all are because of the woman. Complications with certain STDs like Chlamydia and Gonorrhea increase infertility. Certain chemical birth control methods like the pill confuse the women’s cycle. Many women have found it is not easy to get pregnant after being on the pill for a long time. Stress from jobs or difficulties in relationships add to the causes of infertility.

Godly Beginnings for the Family

Learning how to care for infants, before, during and after birth!

Godly Beginnings for the Family book

Click to order download (pdf) with study questions, footnotes, etc. or get the powerpoints and handouts.

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God wants His people to have many children. This is His way; this is His blessing. One author astutely suggests that with all of the damage that birth control devices do, hasn’t anyone realized that multiple pregnancies is probably safer? God made the woman to have babies. Uterine cancer is common only among women who have not had children. Other dangers assail those who have held off from having babies earlier rather than later.

She continues reporting that the regular use of birth control greatly increases the number of menstrual cycles a woman experiences and puts unhealthy stress on the reproductive organs, thus producing more uterine, breast and cervical cancer.

God has made the man and woman to have sex throughout life without birth control except for times of abstinence. God’s ways should be trusted. Why are couples so eager to use birth control? Are they interfering with God’s purpose? What does the world want? Why is its message so strong? Would you obey the world’s message or God’s?

“Behold, children are a gift of the LORD; The fruit of the womb is a reward” (Psalm 127:3).

B) Eating Habits and Nutrition

Thoughts on Nutrition for Pregnant or Nursing Mothers

A good diet might  include: 60-80 grams of protein, 1,000-1,500 grams calcium, whole grains, fresh fruit and veggies in abundance. 6-8 eight ounce glasses of water and iron rich foods are to be taken daily.  Any good pregnancy book should cover this topic in depth giving alternatives for each category.

Every one needs to watch what they eat, Dad and Mom alike. The expecting and nursing Moms have special concerns. Within minutes after pregnant mothers have eaten, the little child that they are carrying begins to receive the effect of the food from the mother. Usually this is good, but it can be bad.

God in a general way has spoken very clearly about things that can and cannot be eaten. We perhaps can get around some of the problems by more efficient cooking, but we need to be alert to God’s concerns. His statutes are wise. We also want to address any special concerns for our children whether they are still in the womb or not.

1) Clean and Unclean

We note below a number of things that are okay to eat and not okay to eat. They help caution us that not all animals are the same. The scavenger animals or bottom feeders are off limits. They eat from dead animals where disease reigns. Although pork is highly esteemed in some places, it is off limits. Adult hogs can carry over a dozen diseases, which are transmissible to humans. They also carry parasites.

“These are the animals which you may eat: the ox, the sheep, the goat, the deer, the gazelle, the roebuck, the wild goat, the ibex, the antelope and the mountain sheep. And any animal that divides the hoof and has the hoof split in two and chews the cud, among the animals, that you may eat. Nevertheless, you are not to eat of these among those which chew the cud, or among those that divide the hoof in two…

And the pig, because it divides the hoof but does not chew the cud, it is unclean for you. You shall not eat any of their flesh nor touch their carcasses. These you may eat of all that are in water: anything that has fins and scales you may eat, but anything that does not have fins and scales you shall not eat; it is unclean for you. You may eat any clean bird” (Deuteronomy 14:3-11).

2) Regarding blood-filled foods

 “Only you shall not eat the blood; you are to pour it out on the ground like water” (Deuteronomy 12:16).

We should not eat things with blood in them. Usually the blood is drained from meats. This warning was given many times throughout the scriptures even before the law like to Noah after the flood. God simply explains that the life is in the blood.

3) Fats are deliciously dangerous

“It is a perpetual statute throughout your generations in all your dwellings: you shall not eat any fat or any blood” (Leviticus 3:17).

The less fats the better!During the sacrifices the animal fat was to be burnt not eaten. Hormones and toxins are found in the fat layers. “Eating animal fat is an important cause of arteriosclerosis, clogging or hardening of the arteries. This fat forms the tiny, fatty, cholesterol tumors within the walls of the arteries, which hinder the flow of blood.” Sure we can have quadruple-bypass heart surgery. That is an option today; in the past clogged arteries was a sure killer. We want to stay alive for our children and for God’s work.

We should note here that there are also vegetable fats. These are even more common. Fried foods are dangerously soaked in these oils. Trans fat is made from the hydrogenation of vegetable oils that can be dangerous to the body. Both fathers and mothers need to eat good and nutritious meals at home. The wife is responsible to prepare them. Eating at fast food restaurants on a regular basis is simply not good for anyone. Sometimes we need to change our lifestyles to eat better.

Is baby formula a good substitute for breast milk? no.4) Breast milk for babies

“To whom would He teach knowledge? And to whom would He interpret the message? Those just weaned from milk? Those just taken from the breast?” (Isaiah 28:9).

Moms should by all means breast feed their babies if at all possible. This is God’s way! One good example of the excellence of nursing is the colostrum that is passed on to the baby in the first few days after birth. Being rich in protein and antibodies the baby is protected from the diseases the mother has built up immunity to. Availability of formulas makes it easy to go the easy way and not keep working at breast-feeding. Baby formulas with all their ads “such and such added” encourage the mother to make inferior choices.

Although formula is good for emergencies, they are certainly far inferior to a mother’s breast milk. We applaud those mothers who pump milk to give their children the best protective nutrients that breast milk supplies. Even better for the child would be a mother at home without the stress of busy schedules accompanied by a closer and softer touch. Moms produce lots of milk only when they are not stressed. Better to change ones lifestyle back to God’s design at home.

5) Eating moderately and fasting

Some diseases occur simply because people eat too much. Obesity is a great killer. The digestive system is not easily able to handle large amounts of food. The scriptures teach us not only what we should and should not eat but also about how much we should eat.

“Do not be with heavy drinkers of wine, Or with gluttonous eaters of meat” (Proverbs 23:20).

But you, when you fast, anoint your head, and wash your face so that you may not be seen fasting by men, but by your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will repay you” (Matthew 6:17-18).

On the other hand, the Bible does teach us to fast. Fasting has both spiritual and physical benefits. On the physical side, fasting allows the body to use up stored fats and enables the system to properly cleanse itself. Expecting and nursing mothers are not expected to fast.

One exception to this is for the mother that has a lot of morning sickness or all-day nausea. The nausea may be the body trying to rid itself of toxins. Fasting helps this process along. As the pregnancy progresses it may be harder to eat regular size meals. It is important to be well nourished so eating several smaller meals is an alternative. I like to think of it as “grazing.”

6) Sugars and a sweet toothwhere did all the nutrients go?

“It is not good to eat much honey, Nor is it glory to search out one’s own glory” (Proverbs 25:27).

Nutrition books tell us that honey and sugar are of the same constitution though honey has some trace minerals. Now if we could only convince ourselves to listen to the scripture about the dangers of consuming too much! Actually, part of the problem is that we don’t realize how much sugar we are eating. Younger people seem to be less influenced (except through cavities) but as a person’s age increases, the harm of much sugar becomes more evident.

Fructose, made out of corn, is the modern day ‘honey.’ It is a common sugar additive and disguised by its name. “… Fructose has been implicated in heart disease, elevated blood cholesterol levels, and blood clotting. Worst of all, fructose causes the white blood cells of the immune system to become sleepy and unable to defend against harmful foreign invaders.”

Let’s note how sugars and sweeteners can ruin your health.

• Sugar can suppress the immune system.
• Sugar can upset the body’s mineral balance.
• Sugar can cause hyperactivity, anxiety, concentration difficulties and crankiness in children.
• Sugar contributes to a weakened defense against bacterial infection.
• Sugar interferes with absorption of calcium and magnesium.
• Sugar can weaken eyesight.
• Sugar can produce an acidic stomach.
• Sugar can promote tooth decay.
• Sugar can produce candidiasis. (a yeast infection)
• Sugar can indirectly cause hemorrhoids.
• Sugar can contribute to osteoporosis.
• Sugar can cause depression.
• Sugar can cause hormonal imbalance.

Pregnant and nursing mothers must be careful not to eat too much sugar. It is only empty calories.

7) Fiber analysis

Now if the Lord wanted us to be healthy, wouldn’t He give us good food? He did by giving us grains.

“Now may God give you of the dew of heaven, And of the fatness of the earth, And an abundance of grain and new wine” (Genesis 27:28).

You might say that you eat plenty of grains. You eat rice, bread and noodles all made from wheat. What people don’t realize is that the nutrition has been stripped from the flour before it was turned into bread, pasta etc... Did you ever notice how white the rice or bread is? This is not normal. The fiber (outer coating) has been removed during the milling process.

Wheat grain kernelsModern day diets lack fiber. Lack of fiber then increases constipation and diseases that evolve from that. This preference for white started with the upper class because they alone could afford it. This is not the case anymore.

The end result is that many people are suffering from rich man’s diseases. Those who have no access to such refined products receive the fiber they need from God’s hand (whole grains) and do not suffer from appendicitis or other digestive disorders.

Some might protest by stating that certain essential vitamins are added to bread or breakfast cereal. But what happened to the other twenty essential vitamins and minerals? Only a few vitamins are actually replaced. See the chart in the sidebar.

God’s original packaging of grains can’t be beat. Fiber can be easily added to ones diet by eating whole grains, vegetables and fruit with the skin.

So what do we do?

1. We first started out by buying whole grain flour and making our own bread in bread machines.

2. Later we learned that more than 50% of the nutrients were lost within 24 hours after grinding the grain. Even our whole wheat flour was lacking. So we looked into buying our own grains and a home grinder. This saves lots of money. Grains are cheap and easy to store (if in colder climate). Most of all we get a nicer flour, lots of fresh nutrients and choices of lots of grains (kamut, rice, soy beans, rye, corn, etc.) to add to the wheat when making flour for bread or other things like pizza. A soft winter wheat (pastry flour) is better for cakes.

3. When our family outgrew 1 or 2 loaves a day, we switched from a bread machine to making it ourselves. With powerful dough mixers, the process is easy and quick.

Rice kernels4. We also use more brown rice, oatmeal to different dishes. Our children are still not quite used to 100% brown rice so we use about half brown (whole) and half white.

5. When buying 50 pound bags of oatmeal, it is easy to make great and inexpensive granola. This is another way to get good fiber and protein.


C) Other Health Concerns

1) Rest and Sleep

“Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a sabbath of the LORD your God; in it you shall not do any work, you or your son or your daughter, your male or your female servant or your cattle or your sojourner who stays with you. For in six days the LORD made the heavens and the earth, the sea and all that is in them, and rested on the seventh day; therefore the LORD blessed the sabbath day and made it holy” (Exodus 20:8-11).

This law to keep one day for rest, relaxation and spiritual worship is largely ignored in our modern life-styles. We should think: constant work equals stress. Soon we are living for work instead of working for a living. Do you actually pause one day each week and worship God? Or do you compromise?

The expectant mother will face all sorts of sleeping spells. That is fine. Take an extra rest. You are not wasting time but caring for your body and the baby. Part of the need for sleep comes from waking up at night to go to the bathroom one or more times. Actually, that is good training for the times when the baby awakes for feeding after birth.

Sleep is important for all. We have found that entertainment including televisions, movies, computer games, (should we add email or 'im'), etc. all act as stimulants. Physical stimuli like caffeine and sugar (late night ice cream) keep people up later as well as these forms of entertainment. Cut them out and so you can see if you are missing out on your sleep signals.

2) Contagious diseases

Society is still willing to be stupid about contagious diseases like STDs including HIV, but otherwise they seem to be getting much more biblical on how to respond to such diseases. We just need a few viruses like SARS and 'Madcow' disease to go around to keep us on our toes. We appreciate the Bible’s instructions on how isolation with careful detection can help protect us.

“But if the priest looks at it, and behold, there are no white hairs in it and it is not lower than the skin and is faded, then the priest shall isolate him for seven days” (Leviticus 13:21).

It is a major step for governments to actually restrain a person’s freedom because of the disease he has. God told us long ago, as much as we don’t like to hear it, isolation works. The LORD thinks it so important that He spent a whole chapter (Leviticus 13) on rightly detecting and treating certain conditions.

Isolation is an important principle for parents of little children to keep in mind. What a terrible habit people have in touching the hands of our infants and children! Parents need to learn to keep our children away from sick children as much as possible. Of course, there will be times this is impossible. We will need to pray and watch (so we can learn more). Mothers need to wash their hands often and train their children to do likewise.

3) Circumcision

There is hot debate on the advantages and disadvantages of circumcising our sons. We will not go into the details here. Two advantages of circumcision are:

(1)  The statistics show that cervical cancer is rare among Jewish and Muslim women. This is because they regularly circumcize their suns.

(2)  Circumcision keeps boys and men cleaner and free from common infections than the uncircumcised. This is less concern in our culture that is much more hygiene conscious. Even if there is an infection, a little antibiotic creams clears the infection up right away.

“And when eight days were completed before His circumcision, His name was then called Jesus, the name given by the angel before He was conceived in the womb.” (Luke 2:21).

Those who espouse non-circumcision are mostly concerned about the pain. God knows the benefit of circumcision outweighs the pain which is quickly forgotten.

More interestingly, vitamin K that causes blood to clot is absent until day eight. However, the blood clotting chemical prothrombin skyrockets on the eighth day to higher than normal (110%).

4) Stimulants and drugs

“For the heavy drinker and the glutton will come to poverty, And drowsiness will clothe a man with rags” (Proverbs 23:21).

Drugs of all sorts pervade our lives. They can negatively affect the baby whether it be cocaine (illicit drug), alcohol, caffeine (coffee, tea, chocolate, soda) or nicotine (smoking). Pregnant and nursing Moms must take special caution to what they eat. If they wouldn’t give it to their child directly, then they shouldn’t give it indirectly either.

It is best to think of medicines even over-the-counter as drugs. Many people are concerned that the overuse of antibiotics can do long term harm to a child’s immune system. We need to do a better job double-checking for side affects. The industry has been doing a better job informing us of these, but still is not complete or so over wordy that we never read the small print.

Parental unresolved sins pass down to their children.D) Relational ‘Diseases’

The Lord says much about problems that develop from improperly dealing with people and struggles. As our Maker, God knows exactly how to handle each difficulty. Jesus modeled this for us.

Let’s look at a few of His injunctions that will protect us. We need to remember that the pregnancy and birth might distract us from such problems, but this does not solve them. If not purposely sought out and solved, they will become our children’s problems.

1) Forgive or be not forgiven

An unforgiving spirit generates a whole set of physical, emotional and spiritual problems. A doctor once said, “Your blood pressure is up today.” With a smile she answered, “I can easily account for that. I just had a heated argument with another patient in your waiting room.””

“He who conceals his transgressions will not prosper, But he who confesses and forsakes them will find compassion” (Proverbs 28:13).

“Then Peter came and said to Him, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven” (Matthew 18:21-22).

If we, as parents, do not forgive others of their sins, then we are going to bring harm to our children. Perhaps we will die early or even worse. We tell our children that we are to love one another but don’t see us modeling it. We must come to the cross and forgive others. Yes, we need to repent for not quickly extending forgivness. Jesus tells us to forgive seventy times seven. Otherwise bitterness piles up in our heart causing all sorts of abnormalities. Is there anyone you need to forgive for offending you?

Check out BFF's articles on 'Importance on Forgiveness.'

2) Fears & Worries

So many fears and worries devastate the lives of people. God simply says to fear Him only and trust Him for our circumstances. When we obey God, we can trust Him and avoid fears and worries.

“Do not be anxious then, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘With what shall we clothe ourselves?” (Matthew 6:31)

“O my God, in Thee I trust, Do not let me be ashamed; Do not let my enemies exult over me” (Psalm 25:2).

Trust in Him at all times, O people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. [Selah.]” (Psalm 62:8).

We quickly gather from these passages that we don’t need to lose our sleep or health from our fears or worries. J.C. Penny’s business was solid during the 1929 crash, but he had made some unwise personal investments. He became so worried that he couldn’t sleep and then developed shingles. The pain was so extreme that he was hospitalized and given sedatives. One night he even thought he would die. He wrote death notes to his loved ones. Something happened the next morning that changed his life.

The next morning the great business tycoon heard singing in the hospital chapel. He struggled to go listen and as he entered the chapel, the group was singing, ‘God will Take Care of You’ followed by scripture and a prayer. In Mr. Penny’s own words he wrote,

“Suddenly something happened. I can’t explain it. I can only call it a miracle. I felt as if I had been instantly lifted out of the darkness of a dungeon into warm, brilliant sunlight. I felt as if I had been transported from hell to paradise. I felt the power of God as I had never felt it before. I realized then that I alone was responsible for all my troubles. I know that God with His love was there to help me. From that day to this, my life has been free from worry. I am seventy-one years old, and the most dramatic and glorious minutes of my life were those I spent in that chapel that morning: ‘God will take Care of You.”

God has a greater plan. Fears and worries pass down to our children. They learn from us their parents. How? Worries and fears are built on doubts about God’s ability to care for us. Instead of passing on faith to trust God, we actually pass on doubt! Are there any worries or fears in your life? Are there circumstances that cause worries or fears to arise? Learn to trust God for them.

Check out BFF's Series on 'Overcoming Anxiety: Finding Peace and Discovering God.'

3) Love or selfishness

Our family sings in devotional times a song called, “Love is something that you give it away.” Our families must be filled with love. Surely critical remarks, negative attitudes, harsh, wrong and unkind words are work to destroy our children. Unless we get rid of our bitterness, judgmental attitudes, pride, jealousies and hatred, our bodies will suffer right along with our children. Haven’t you seen families destroyed by a critical spirit?

God’s solution is free. It only calls for commitment to keep giving away the very best. As we do, God keeps filling the bins of our heart with more and more. Grudges, vendettas, scheming and plots all have to go.

“For the whole Law is fulfilled in one word, in the statement, “YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF” (Galatians 5:14).

Check out BFF's Series on Love.


God’s way is best! We only need to go back to God’s Word to find solutions for everything from constipation to worry. God speaks directly about sex, good hygiene, what to eat and what not to eat. God is trying to get us to walk His path. If we do, “none of these diseases” of the world will come upon us. We will live long lives.

We are humbled later in Deuteronomy 28 where God tells His people what will happen if they do not obey Him. Remember blessings do not come automatic. They are contingent on obedience. God is so clear.

“And He will bring back on you all the diseases of Egypt of which you were afraid, and they shall cling to you. Also every sickness and every plague which, not written in this book of this law, the Lord will bring on you until you are destroyed” (Deuteronomy 28:60-61).

God would so much want His people to have health. We certainly need to seek Him and His ways. Even more, as we do this we will be able to give the best loving and healthy lives to our children. In the end we can say to them, this is all God’s gift to you from us.  

BFF Parenting  DVDThe BFF Parenting Library has both the Biblical Parenting Principles for Toddlers materials as well Godly Beginnings for the Family. It includes Powerpoint slides and handouts for each session. Click the Library for more information. The many practical training materials supplied on this one Library can't be found elsewhere. More info.


Next => Preparations for Childbirth
Childbirth is a miracle. Now if we would only stop interfering with God's ways our births would be better and easier.